Your Optimistic Emotions V Your Honest Reality 

By Ange Fonce

Being “optimistic emotionally” seems like a good idea... 

"I will start next week." 

"My project will start soon." 

"I will be there in ten minutes."

“I will talk to that woman... soon.”

“He is so cute... he is bound to talk to me.”

The “optimistic emotional promise”... is that the “emotional expectation of completion” will raise your “expectations” and increase the odds that something will "actually" happen.

In fact... though... in "reality"... there are huge costs to being “optimistic emotionally”... when you announce things based on “optimistic emotions”... to other people you are engaging with... in building plans based on your “optimistic emotions” at the time of your announcement... and the cost to other people and yourself when you cannot in “honest reality” fulfil your “optimistic emotional announcement”... can be high indeed... of yours and other peoples TIME and RESOURCES!

The Alternative Is Honest Time... 

Time... you  deliberately “invest” without recourse or negotiation... to “make things happen” when you say it will happen... deadlines will be meet when you say they will be meet... and you GET IT DONE!

"I will talk to that woman... NOW!"

The train leaves at 5:52... not 5:57... no matter how much you want it to wait.

The work starts at 9 am tomorrow... the conference starts at precisely when you say it will....  the project will be completed by... so the world plans on it and depends on your "honest reality" and effectiveness grows.

It does not get published because it is ready... it gets published because it is due... the “deadline” is meet... amazingly... this rule makes things ready and completed a lot more often... it is a point of view and an HONEST contract with yourself and others... it GETS DONE because YOU said it would... GET DONE!

Then there is the “optimistic hustler”... who is always asking... of putting themselves out there... of looking for shortcuts and a faster way... this is the hustle of it it “does not hurt to ask”... of what you do not know will not hurt you... of the ends justifying the means... the “optimistic emotional hustler” propositions... pitches and works at all times to take the “easy way”... the “emotional right now”... this kind of “optimistic emotional hustler” always wants more for less... this kind of “optimistic emotional hustler” will cut corners... and “short change” others... if it helps in them getting picked.

Then there is the “honest hustler”... who can be quite difficult and yet... “very effective”... this is the hustle of being "more generous" than you need to be... of speaking “truthfully” and with acting with “integrity”... even if it delays the “ultimate goal” in the short run... and most of all... the hustle of being “honestly prepared” for doing the work... delivering EXCEPTIONAL VALUE and GETTING IT DONE!

It is a shame that one approach is more common... and appropriately disrespected and abused... while the “honest” other sits largely unused.

Your Emotional Mood v Your Honest Reality...

Who is 100% happy?

Are rock stars... billionaires... the rich and famous happier... what about teenage girls with clear skin... the man who just had the hot woman agree to “meeting up” for coffee?

Either what happens in “reality” changes our “emotional mood”... or our “emotional mood”... effects the way we narrate what happens in our “reality”... this goes beyond “happiness economics” and the “understanding” that a certain baseline of “health and success” is needed for many people to be happy... the question worth pondering is...

"Are you seeking out the “imperfect” to justify your habit of being unhappy... does something have to happen in the outside world for you to be happy inside?"

Or... to put it differently... is there a “narrative of your reality” that supports your mood?

People spend billions trying to create a “connection” between what you see in the mirror and your happiness... implying that others are “judging” you in a way that ought to make you unhappy.

Yet is the true?

The way we process “our reality” can change today... and be different tomorrow... our internal narrative... the laundry list we tick off... the things we highlight for ourselves and others... our narrative of “reality” is completely up to us.

The simple shortcut... of the way we “emotionally respond” to the things that we cannot change... can instantly transform our lives. 

"That is interesting"... is a thousand times more productive than... "that is terrible"... even more powerful is our ability to stop “experiencing failure”... before it even happens... because of course it usually does not.

Our “honest reality” is often distorted by our “emotions”... and prevents us from being “aware” of what is “honestly” presenting it self there in “reality”... excessive “optimistic emotions”... are a “great distortion” of what we can really "honestly" do in our “reality”... we make “false promises” to others and ourselves... that in “reality”... are “impossible” to fulfil... which makes us "dishonest" to others... and "fooling" ourselves!

Happiness... for most of us is a “choice”... reality is not... it seems though that “choosing” to be “realistically optimistic” in our "emotional happiness"... ends up transforming the “honest reality” of our lives that we “choose”... and make a “choice”... to “fulfil” in our living... and keep track of.

Thank you and may you enjoy a Prosperous and Dynamic day!

Yours Sincerely


Ange is an  Author... Speaker... and Dynamic Peak Performance Personal Development Consultant... and Humanistic Counselling Psychologist who works with men and women on line and real world who desire to "personally develop" themselves and their "relationships" to become Dynamic Lifers... "creators" of their own life and wealth!


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