When You Wake Up In The Morning Who Do You Think About? 

By Ange Fonce

Strange question I know to start this article with... bear with me and read on. 

One of the question” that I get asked a lot about is attraction... it could be men looking to attract women... women looking to attract men... even business owners looking to attract customers... and I would like to share two ideas that might help you if you fall into one of these categories. 

For Example...

Let us say you are a chiropractor... who is looking to attract more customers to your business... and you are reasonable successful and would like more customers... so here is the first idea to consider. 

Nobody wakes up in the morning thinking that they would be contacted by a chiropractor... it just does not happen... why? 

Because most of the time... people are thinking about the stuff that concerns them... what they are doing that day... what they want to eat... what to feed the kids...etc... no one wakes up thinking about a chiropractor... what they do think about is the back pain that they are in... how maybe they cannot even put their socks on cause they hurt so much or how they cannot tie their shoes... or how they can sit comfortably in their car... in other words... if they are in pain... they are thinking about the pain that they are in... and how to ease their pain and not too much else... especially if the pain is severe. 

So how would a chiropractor get him or herself in front of someone with this pain? 

He or she would market and advertise in those places where people are looking to get rid of this pain... maybe the chiropractor would have on their website a free download about the best stretches to do to alleviate back pain... where customers can leave their name and email address... once that happens... the chiropractor can then contact the visitors and educate them about the benefits of seeing a chiropractor. 

The point is... you have to meet people where they already are... so if they are in pain... then that is where the conversation starts... with their pain! 

Does that make sense to you? 

Okay... the next idea involves a technique to help others to think about you... are you interested in learning about this? 

So in the first idea I talked about how to meet people where they are and the example that I gave was that no one wakes up in the morning thinking about a chiropractor... what they do wake up and think about is the pain that they have in their back... and so it is the chiropractors job to get himself or herself in front of these people and educate them about the benefits of seeking out a chiropractor. 

The second idea that I want to talk about has to do with how you invest your time. 

And I am not talking about being more productive or investing your time better or any of the other things that I have shared with you in other articles about time... this is a very different use of time... by investing your time to be absent.

And if you are thinking to yourself...

“Ange... investing time to be absent... that is crazy.”

Hear me out and read on...

There are circumstances were investing time to be absent can have a very profound effect in increasing your personal value to others... and  the one thing that I want to impress upon you is the idea that...

Absence Makes The Heart Grow Fonder

And what I mean by that is this is that sometimes you can get others to think about you more by sharing less time with them. 

What do I mean by this? 

Instead of making yourself accessible to everyone for all the time that they want... at times it might be to your benefit to limit the amount of time that you do certain things with them in order for them to appreciate that shared time more. 

For Example... 

Say you have 3 kids and they are at home for the summer holidays and they want you to play with them... even more so now that they have the free time to do so... of course you still have the same amount of work to do during the day... yet they do not see that and say your youngest son in particular wants to play catch with you when you get home and most times you play catch with him. 

Now here is the trick...  you never let him decide when it is time to quit... because if you did... he would quit when he started to get bored of it and you do not want him to get bored... so you will play catch with him for a while... maybe a half hour or so and then you will do something else and you let him know that the next time that you play catch... you want him to try this and then give him something specific to work on or try and he will always remember this because he will start reminding you of what you said the very next day when you get home.

It is called priming and while you are away... he will be thinking of what you said and either doing or trying out the task you gave him and looking forward to the next catch session were he can show you what he has learned and the reward is him showing you what he has learnt... your praise him and reward him by more valuable time being shared with you!

And the really IMPORTANT point here is this... ALWAYS keep to YOUR WORD... other wise he will lose TRUST in you. 

I employed this same strategy when I worked with the City Youth Service and I was running summer programs in Outdoor Education some years ago and the strategy was to never to let a game or interest die. 

In other words... if the young people had a favourite game or activity that they enjoyed playing... I would never let them play it to the point where they started to lose interest in it... because that would be the death of the game or activity... and the interest...  instead I would make sure that they were all having fun and still enjoying the game... and then change gears and do something else. 

Did they baulk at this? 

Of course they did... yet it made them want to play the game or activity even more the next time. 

Can this work with adults as well? 


Sometimes it happens naturally... other times you have to influence the situation...  have you ever met someone for the first time that you had strong feelings for and you were not able to share as much time with them as you wanted? 

Maybe they had a crazy work schedule or you had a crazy schedule and for whatever reason you could not see them as much as you wanted to... what did you do? 

You more and likely invested most of your time that you were not physically with them... thinking about them instead and yearning for them and do you know that is when you start falling in love with that person... it is not so much when you are physically with them... it is when they are absent and you are thinking about them... that is when those powerful feelings grow inside you and you just cannot wait to physically see them... hence the saying...

Absence makes the heart grow fonder. 

Now I am not suggesting that you purposely go out of your way to avoid others... what I am suggesting is that you consider limiting the time that you“share with other people and see what type of effect this has on your relationships...you might be surprised at the outcome... because remember this other saying...

“Familiarity breeds contempt.”

Make you time valuable and you make you VALUABLE and others want to share their time with you.

Have you any thoughts or comments you would like to share with me on what I have written?

I would love to hear from you.

Thank you and may you enjoy a Prosperous and Dynamic day!

Yours Sincerely

Intellectual Badass... noun

1... A person with a penchant for Science... creativity... books... writing... communication... fitness... women... sexing... sexuality... human relationships... psychology... physiology and any other area involving heavy use of the Intellect.

2... A bright kick arse person and glamorously Intelligent!

3... Ange is an Author... Speaker and Dynamic Peak Performance Personal Development Consultant... and Humanistic Counselling Psychologist and Sexologist... who works with those men and women who desire to personally develop themselves and their relationships to become Dynamic Lifers... creators of their own life... relationships and wealth! 

4... If you are Happy and you Know it... you are becoming a Dynamic Lifer!

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