Thinking Or Feeling How Do You Make Decisions And Choices? 

By Ange Fonce

Now we are going to look at two different ways of making decisions.  

Thinkers feel and feelers think...  we have a “natural” tendency to lean one way or the other when it comes to making “decisions” and “choices”... some of us decide with the “head” and “think” things through before “deciding” and “choosing”... while others will run things through their “emotions”... before deciding and choosing what is best for them... with their heart.  

Now it use to be thought... that “thinkers” had the edge when it come to “logical thinking”... yet since the 1970's and particularly since Doctor Goleman work on Emotional Intelligence... and a greater understanding of the “adaptive unconscious”... it seems that our “emotions” have an “instinctual logic” of their own... and that both ways of processing “information” we receive from the outside world... have their advantages and disadvantages when it comes to “decision” making for the “choices” we make...  “rationality” can be fooled when “instinct” can “intuit” when something is not as it seems... and “emotions” can completely “mislead” us... when “rational thinking” can provide the answers.

Take a look at the lists below and decide which “style”... is more like you.


Values logic above sentiment...  makes decisions based on “evidence”... rationalises with the head.

Usually impersonal... being more interested in things than in human relationships... and sees things as an “observer” from outside the situation.

If forced to choose between “truthfulness” and “tactfulness”... will usually be "truthful"... concerned with truth... justice and provable “knowledge” and understanding.

Stronger in "executive ability" than in social arts.

Will likely to question the conclusion of others on principle... they want “evidence” of what is being said to them.... and tend to be “sceptics.” 

Pride themselves on truth and objectivity.

More business like and task oriented.

Are usually able to organize “facts” and “ideas” into “logical sequence” that states the subject they are dealing with makes “necessary points”... that comes to a “logical conclusion” and stops there without repetition... once anything is completed... it is done... and move forward to the next subject... task... project... goal.

Contributes to society by “intellectual criticism” of its habits... customs and beliefs by exploring the “negatives”... to find “positive” solutions to problems with support of science and research.

More focused on what is fair and just.

Think about “emotions!”

Enjoy proving a point.
Will tend to be more “future” orientated.


Values “emotions” above logic...  decisions and choices will be more “instinctual” than “rational.”

Usually personal... being more interested in people than in things and sees things as a “participant” from within a situation... they are directly “emotionally” involved in events.

If forced to choose between "tactfulness" and "truthfulness"... they will usually choose to be “tactful.”

Concerned with “relationships” and harmony.

Stronger in "social arts" than in executive ability.

Are more likely to agree with others... going with “mainstream  thinking” as the “cultural” and “social norm”... feeling them probably right.

May minimize truth to maintain harmony. 

Naturally friendly and  more appreciative of others.

Can often find it hard to express their “emotions” in an orderly sequence and  may therefore ramble and repeat themselves with more detail than a thinker wants or thinks necessary.

Contributes to society by their loyal support of  “positives” works and movements... and will often be “committed” for the community to benefit as a whole.

More "empathetic" and focused on what others feel.

Relates to the world through their “emotions.”

Enjoys promoting harmony.

Lives more in the moment of “now”... and can be deeply affected by traumas of the past.

Thinker or Feeler?

Now... how do you “decide” and make “choices”...  more with your head... or your heart?  

Either way is not wrong or right...  it is just a “different” way of “assessing” what “decision” and “choices” are to be made.  

If you are more of a  “strong thinker” or a “strong feeler”... it is very useful when you are working on your “personal development"... to “focus” and achieve some “balance” between “thinking” and “feeling” by learning to “develop” either the “thinking” or “feeling” side of you.  

For example in parenting... 

A “thinker” can be to rigid at times... while a “feeler” can be too soft...  children need a “balance” of each...  they need to learn “boundaries” and limits...  they also need “love” and “compassion”...  if you and your spouse are opposites here... you need to learn to “value” one anothers “perspective” and look for middle ground.

Sometimes “feelers” are not always “honest” because it may hurt someones feelings... because they care about others and how they would “feel.”  

They need to learn to speak the “truth” in a "loving authentic" way...  and “thinkers” can be “harsh” and “uncaring” in delivering the “truth”... they need to understand that while being “honest” is a “positive” virtue... “honesty” can be a “double edged sword” and do a lot of “emotional harm” to others... so just like “feelers”... “thinkers” need to learn to deliver the “truth”... in a “loving caring” way! 

Thank you and may you enjoy a Prosperous and Dynamic day!

Yours Sincerely

Ange is an  Author... Speaker... and Dynamic Peak Performance Personal Development Consultant... and Humanistic Counselling Psychologist who works with men and women on line and real world who desire to "personally develop" themselves and their "relationships" to become Dynamic Lifers... "creators" of their own life and wealth!

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