How Introverts Can Make a Positive First Impression 

By Ange Fonce

If you feel awkward meeting people and being at "social gatherings"... here are ways that have helped me over the years that can “help” you feel "relaxed" and create" a "positive" first impression and make "connections" when you are the more "introverted" personality type.

When meeting somebody new... you usually follow an established “social ritual”... a handshake... an assessment of relative status... a few words of “small talk” and then you sit down and get to the business at hand... “introverts” and extroverts alike find this an easy ritual to follow..

In “social settings” and work related events like conferences... extrovert's have a definite “social advantage... because they naturally tend to be a "people person"... and extroverts usually are able to start and join conversations and generally find it easy to “relax”... appear “confident” and enjoy themselves.

Unlike “introverts” who can often struggle at “social gatherings”... extroverts being a “peoples person” type can really enjoy "social gatherings"... to an "introvert"...  it can be terrifying to walk up to somebody and start talking... or to cut in on a conversation in progress... because there is no ritual and it comes down to your “social communication skills”...  "introverts" often retreat into the corners and quiet spaces nursing their drinks.

I know exactly how that feels because I am by nature an “introvert” and large groups of people can overwhelm me... yet in smaller groups of people maybe 20 to 30... I can thrive... because I am often the facilitator and sometimes the speaker and people usually come up and talk to me without any major effort on my part... and I will also work the room myself... and there are ways you can do this as an “introvert” and create a “great first impression” of yourself.

Adjust Your Mental Attitude...

When "introverts" introduce themselves... they usually feel nervous... which can male them appear “socially awkward”... which is unfair... yet that is the “impression” they give... and while "introverts” are less likely to feel as calm as extroverts... "introverts" can “interrupt” the “inner dialogue” that is making them nervous.

I always prepare for a “social event”.... by standing in front of a mirror and saying the word "relax it will be great" over and over to myself in as many “different voices” and “expressions” as possible... this creates a different “mindset" for me and in turn alters my “physiological” state to that of being “relaxed” and it will be a “great” event in my "mind."

When you are approaching a group of people or somebody whom you would really like to meet and get to know... imagine yourself saying "relax it will be great"... this “interrupts” your “negative inner dialogue” long enough to take the plunge without becoming overly nervous.

Look Them In The Eye And Smile...

Whether you are an extrovert or “introvert”... using “eye contact” and a “big smile” is always a plus... looking the other person in the eye... sounds basic... yet when meeting people “introverts” often look down or sideways to avoid making the other person feel uncomfortable... or to cover their own discomfort... which can unfortunately send the “non verbal message” as either “arrogance” or “dislike.”

The solution is to notice and “mentally name” the “colour” of the other persons eyes... this “intellectual exercise” forces you to make “eye contact”... and  so all you need to do at that point is add a “warm smile.”

Open Your Body Language...

This step is very simple... do not “cross your arms” or “link your hands together”... because those “gestures” can communicate “doubt... defensiveness” and even “hostility”... instead... learn to relax your “body posture”... relax your shoulders... arms and hands... which “creates” a “posture”  that shows you are “open” and “approachable” and are a lot more “friendly.”

Synchronize Your Voice And Gestures...

If the other person is speaks fast... speak fast... if the other person speaks slowly... speak slowly... “observe” how the other person is “standing” and “gesturing”... as you talk... “mirror” some aspects of their “posture” and make similar... yet not identical “gestures.”

Extroverts “synchronize unconsciously”... and “introverts” sometimes have to treat it as an “intellectual exercise”... the result is often the same in building a sense of “rapport” between you and the other person.

Find Common Ground...

Rather than the usual “small talk”... use “small talk” to “open up” and deepen the conversation by asking “open... off the wall questions”... here are some good examples...

“What do you do for fun?”

“What are you most passionate about?”

“What is your favourite cause or charity/”

“What in your life makes you the most proud off?”

“What is on your “to do” list in life?”

As you “listen” to their responses... find something that you and the other person have in “common” and ask a “question” or make an “observation” about it.

For example... 

Say you ask... 

"Just out of curiosity... what is on your “to do” list in life?" 

And say the other person replies that they want to visit Paris... and if you have already been there... you can say something about your “experience”... and if it is also on your “to do” list... say so!

As you gather “intelligence” about the other person and you find “common ground” with them the conversation will gradually become more “relaxed” and “natural”... I use this method all the time and it “helps” me “relax” into conversations with other people and them relax with me. 

So even if you are an “introvert”... you can be a very “skilled” social person... and do not have to hide in the corners... because you feel “socially awkward.”

Thank you and may you enjoy a Prosperous and Dynamic day!

Yours Sincerely

Ange is an  Author... Speaker... and Dynamic Peak Performance Personal Development Consultant... and Humanistic Counselling Psychologist who works with men and women on line and real world who desire to "personally develop" themselves and their "relationships" to become Dynamic Lifers... "creators" of their own life and wealth!

Recommended Reading...

Do YOU Connect? 3 Ways To Improve Your Communication Skills 

By Ange Fonce

It is a common paradox among men and women who want to connect... and we want more friends and we are aching for connection and intimacy... and yet... we find ourselves lonely and even worse... scared to connect.

So if connecting with other human beings is something you feel you would like to achieve more... here are some useful tips you can learn and put into action...

1... Be more focused on being present with the person...

Join today and become one of the Tribe... a DYNAMIC Lifer... and if you want to "share" or "forward to a friend" a writing... please go ahead... and let them know they can receive their own writings via e mail by directly joining The Tribe of Dynamic Lifers The DYNAMIC Express Magazine... I am sure they will "appreciate your consideration" of them.

Dynamic Life Development Systems 

Personal Development Academy