Do You Know What Kind Of Sex DNA Your Lover has? 

By Ange Fonce

“The desire of the man is for the woman... and the desire of the woman is for the desire of the man” 

Now do you "know" what turns your “lover” on?

After a few years of sharing “sexing” with a "lover"... most of us have a tendency to get into a bit of a rut... and our “sexing” goes on “automatic pilot”... we make the same moves that have worked in the past... we tend to repeat what we “know”... again and again... soon “sexing” becomes just the same old routine and starts to be boring.

Many sex surveys have found that after 2 years of marriage or being in a committed relationship the amount of “sexing” has dropped in half... and most of the women would rather go shopping than make “sexing!”

Another “factor” is that fluctuating “hormones... fatigue” and “emotional shifts” in both men and women change from day to day.

I “know” one key for having “great sexing” is to pay close “attention” to “how” your partner “responds” to your “touch”... the “pleasure” they “feel” in "your touch”... and at the same time... “feel” how "your lover" is “responding.”

Paying “attention” gives you the “ability” to "see" and "feel" what they “like” and what is not so comfortable for them... and to change your “techniques” for “maximum pleasure.”

I have found the more I can “let go” and “relax” in “sexing” and be “turned on” at the same time... the more I can start to “feel” in my body my partners “energy” and “orgasms.”

With “focus”... I have developed this “ability” to be “highly sensitive” in my "sexing"... that I can “feel” and be in “empathy” with a womans “orgasmic energy” in my body... this allows me to “orgasm” with my “sexing" with her again and again. 

The following is one “pleasurable method” to increase your “ability” to “learn” more about your “lovers hot spots” and to practice “developing” your “sensitivity” and “grow” in “awareness” of your “lovers sexing”... their Sex DNA.

The basic “method” is to take turns “touching... caressing” and “stroking” your “lover” while nude.

Start this exercise when you are not turned on... now the person “receiving” gives “verbal feedback” during the “touching process” from zero to ten.

Zero is cold and ten is totally hot.

Touch all areas of your “lovers body”... not just the usual “hot zones”... you “touch” using “different qualities” from “light” to “firm”... using “caressing... brushing... blowing... kissing... licking... nip biting... pinching” and “light spanking”... their body ALL OVER... do not forget the big toes and fingers... the face... hair and for the more adventurous... the anus.

Touch with “pleasure”... your “enjoyment” of “touching” them and not just to turn your “lover on"... be in your “sensations” in your fingers and lips and not just in your head.

Invest at least 30 minutes “mapping” your “partners responses”... you will “notice” and “feel” as your “lover gets turned on”... you will find areas that become more “hot” than at the start of this exercise... make sure you take “mental notes” of “how” your lover “responds” and  what works and what does not for the next time you share “sexing” and “loving.”

Now change roles and repeat the above.

If you are a bit hesitant to introduce the above “practice” with your “lover”... ask yourself “why” you “feeling fearful”...  and then  do it anyway... face your fear and move through it and build your "sexual confidence."

I guarantee you will “learn” something “new” about your “lovers hot spots” and their Sex DNA... I like to call one persons “sexual individuality” as their Sex DNA... or “bed footprint"... and we are all “different” in so many “aspects”... so “why” would things be any different when it comes to our “sexually identity?”

In order to learn your Sexual DNA and “how” to pair it with your partners... and they to yours...  you must “find out” what type of Sex DNA you and your “lover” have.

Here is a deconstructed “basic list” that will help you clear things out more rapidly... it is best if you “read this together” with your partner... so that you both “find” out which area you fall out into.

Types Of Sex DNA...

The Sensual... 

Sex is an “important” part of the “relationship” for you... and you want both you and your partner to “enjoy” the “benefits” of “orgasmic pleasure”... to manage this... you make sure you “satisfy” all of your “partners desires”... and you want “equal time” in getting your wants and needs met... and are not afraid of letting your partner know what you find “pleasurable”... yet this does not mean that you have “sexing” for the sake of... well... “sexing.” 

You care more about the “emotional connections” that becomes stronger between the two of you each time you reach another level of “sensual euphoria.”

The Erotic... 

You want “sexing” to be “intense” and “passionate” at least some of the time... you can cope with periods of “vanilla sexing”... provided there are regular “opportunities” for “adventurous” and “sizzling sexing”... if you have a “strong erotic libido”... you get little or no pleasure from “low key sexing” and this might cause “problems” in your “relationship”... because your partner might start to “feel” a pressure to perform at great heights all of the time... which is never good... remember that “variety is the spice of life” and that "soft... slow" and "gentle" can build to the "intensity" of "full on animalistic f69king!" 

The Dependent...

You need “sexing” to cope with “problems”... and “sexing” soothes you and makes you “feel better”... you probably “masturbated” a lot in your teenage years... mainly to better deal with “negative feelings” such as “stress... boredom” or “anxiety”... if your partner does not want to do it when you want... because your “too emotional state”... you tend to interpret it as a “lack of love... caring” and even “rejection”... it is like he or she is refusing to give you the “fix” you need to “feel better"... because of your lack of “personal esteem.”

The Reactive... 

You care more about the “sexing needs” of your partner... and you even end up ignoring your own “sexing desires” if you “feel” they are not what your partner usually “enjoys”... you put a lot of effort into “foreplay” and can only “orgasm” once you make sure he or she did... if your partner is not in the mood... you would rather “masturbate” than impose your own “sexing needs.”

The Entitled... 

You “assume” that it is your given right to get whatever you want in your “sexing”... if you want “hot steamy sexing”... you should be given the “opportunity” to have “hot steamy sexing”... if on the other hand... you want “cuddling”.... your partner should provide you with just that... you are very “influenced” by the “idealization of sexing” in movies and books and “think” that you are “entitled” to have the same “great sexing” they are having on screen... because you are you... and you are that “special”... you are also “sexually selfish” and "sexually naive!"

The Addictive... 

Your “problem” is that you cannot seem to resist the lure of having “sexing” outside your “relationships”... it is not that you do not “love” your partner... it is that you are constantly “craving more”... you “think” that “couple sex” is “boring” compared to the “dangerous allure” of "sexing" with a complete stranger or a secret f69k buddy. 

For example...

Like any “addiction”... it is the “behaviour” that “controls you” rather than vice versa... and although you might “feel bad” when “cheating”... you just cannot stop doing it.

Some therapy sessions and counselling are in need of here.

The Stressed...

You are always on your toes... constantly “worrying” about your “performance” and about whether what you are doing is “pleasurable” or not... you tend to avoid “sexing” for fear of “failure”... even though you might still be “very aroused”... you are a fan of “masturbation”... because in these moments the pressure is off and you can “enjoy” the pleasure “wholeheartedly”... you have to “learn” to become “sexually confident” and to “relax” in “sexing.”

The Disinterested...

There are persons that have “naturally low libidos”... they practically have no “physical” or “emotional problem” with “sexing”... they just seem to not be in the mood... if you are one of those... you might develop “feelings” of “guilt” and “defensiveness” because you are not able to satisfy your partner... yet you must accept that you have not “chosen” to be a “low libido type”... and I would say this... when your “sexuality” does get “fired up”... totally “enjoy yourself” and go “all in”... and “enjoy sexing” as others do... just because it my not be often... does not mean you cannot totally “enjoy yourself” when you are in the mood.

The Detached... 

The “detached libido type” usually “feels sexing desire”... and are too “preoccupied” with other “life issues” to seek out “couple sexing”... usually “masturbating” to relieve “sexual frustrations” because it is the “simpler solution”... being overwhelmed by “stress” from financial or work pressure... you might “think” that “sexing” is the last thing on your list right now... and be “aware” that this “attitude” does more harm to you than anything else .

The Compulsive... 

While the Erotic libido wants to “explore” all the “wondrous variety” of “sexing”... the “compulsive" has one main “sexing object” or situation that triggers “sexing arousal”... some “compulsions” can be incorporated into a “sexing relationship”... yet others... such as the “compulsive” use of “internet pornography”... excludes a partner.

Extreme “compulsive libido types” can only be aroused using a “sexing object” or “ritual”... which “creates” a lot of damage inside a “relationship”... because a “unilateral position” in this area is bound to lead to ”frustrations” from the other partner.

Sexual Compatibility

Please also know that “sexual compatibility” is rare straight off in a “relationship”... because you are two “individuals” getting to “know” and “understand” each other... so that means you also have to get to "know" and "understand" each others Sexual DNA... and such things as "instant sexual compatibility" only occurs in romance novels and films... that is why it is “important to share” and “find out” about each others Sex DNA in a “sexual way” and make the best of the situation you are in... so you can both “enjoy sexing” each other and enjoy a “mutually full filling relationship” with each other without dreaming of “impossible standards”... which will leave you both “unsatisfied” and ultimately “unhappy... frustrated” and possibly searching for “sexing” elsewhere.

As always... leave a man or woman all the "better" for "knowing" you.

Thank you and may you enjoy a Prosperous and Dynamic day!

Yours Sincerely

Ange is an  Author... Speaker... Multipreneur and Humanistic Counselling Psychologist and Dynamic Peak Performance Personal Development Consultant and Sexologist... who works with men and women in cyber space and real world who desire to "personally develop" themselves and their "relationships" and their "wealth" to become Dynamic Lifers... "creators" of their "own life!"

Recommended Reading...

Do You Know What Erotic Questioning Is? 

By Ange Fonce

A gentle... easy way for couples to bring “erotic talk” into your “lovemaking” is by using two processes that I call “erotic questioning."

I suggest that you start by “kissing” or holding your partner so there is a natural flow of “erotic tension” between you... slowly stroke and caress your lovers body in “two different areas” or in “two different ways.” 

For example... 

You might stroke the back of her neck and the...

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