Do People Tune You Out And Why They Do It To You?

By Ange Fonce

All "relationships" are about "communication" and will determine whether you will have the power of "persuasion" and "influence" or just become "white noise" in the background in everyday life... lacking any form of "authority."

Now... when you are "speaking"... you want people to pay "attention" and "listen" to you... and when you indulge any of these all too common habits... their minds will wander and "tune" you out.

1... You Go On Far Too Long...

Life is short.. "time" is life... money and everything else... unless you have something "exceptional" to say... get to the point swiftly.

Never do more "time" talking than you do "listening."

2.... You Keep Going Over Well Trod Ground...

If everything you say sounds exactly like what everyone else is saying... there is no "particular reason" to "listen" to you... unless you are bringing a "unique new perspective" to an old "problem" to the table.

So... before you speak... "consider" whether you are "adding to the conversation" or just recapping what has been already said. If the latter... why are you bothering when it has already been done?

3... You Are Not Truly Committed...

People instinctively "know" when you secretly are not "committed" to what you are saying... they sense the lack of "feeling" and "passion" in your "voice" and "body language"... either "change" what you are saying or "change" what you are "committed" too.

Passion and "tonality" of your voice draws others to you and "captures their attention"... that is what you want... is it not?

4... Your Mind Is Elsewhere...

Now... if your "mind is elsewhere" and "unfocused"... where do you expect other peoples "minds" to be?

People can tell when you are "preoccupied" with something else... like your personal life... some other meeting... or what you will be having for lunch that day.

Do not "tune in"... if you "truly" cannot "focus" on the "conversation" at hand and give others your "full attention."

Explain "why"... then reschedule the "conversation" for "another time."

Be "honest" with yourself and with others... you will gain more RESPECT for your "integrity"... then wasting yours and other peoples "time"... which will destroy your "credibility."

5... You Are Not Speaking Clearly...

You cannot expect people to "listen" when any part of what you are saying comes out as a mumbled monotone... or a garbled non nonsensical mess... learn to "speak clearly".. slowly and speak up.. those who are "precise" in their "communication"... carry "authority" and so in turn have the power of "influence" and "persuasion."

6... You Are Talking Too Fast.. .

This is just as bad as mumbling... when you cram too many words into too short a time... you come off as either nervous... impatient or wired on too much coffee or other substances? 

All good reasons not to "listen" to you... slow down and learn to use "silence."

Silence is a very "powerful" means of "communication"... when you "know" when to use it and "time" it right.

Now... slow down and THINK before you speak.

Instead of being motor mouth!

7... Your Accent Could Be Annoying...

Difficult one this... some accents are just to confusing to people who did not grow up where you grew up.

Try as far as possible... to tone down your accent when talking to somebody from another area... and do not use local slang words... you will just confuse others all the more.

Keep to plain simple English or your cultural language and vice versa.

8... What You Are Saying Is Irrelevant...

Nobody really wants to "know" about anything that is not "immediately applicable" to his or her current job.. situation or the task at hand.

Now... before saying something... take a "moment" to "imagine" that you are the other person. 

Ask yourself... is this something I "need to know?" 

If not... do not say it... the world is already overflowing with "verbal" junk mail... why add to it?

9... You Have Lost Your Credibility...

In ALL kinds of "relationships"... your  "integrity... trustworthiness" and "reputation" are everything. 

Once people decide that you are not worthy of any of these... you have lost "their attention"... it does not matter then what you say. 

You have become just more white noise.

Sincere... real... passionate and "genuine communication" is VALUED... appreciated... trusted... and "remembered!"

Bullshit is not.

Your CHOICE to be CREDIBLE or not?

As always... leave a man or woman all the "better" for "knowing" you.

Thank you and may you enjoy a Prosperous and Dynamic day!

Yours Sincerely

Ange is an  Author... Speaker... Humanistic Counselling Psychologist and Dynamic Peak Performance Personal Development Consultant and Sexologist... who works with men and women on line and real world who desire to "personally develop" themselves and their "relationships" to become Dynamic Lifers... "creators" of their own life and wealth!

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