Are You Doing These 7 Behaviours That Kill Your Attractiveness? 

By Ange Fonce

If you are struggling to attract the type of man or woman you REALLY want… then there is something important you really need to understand.

Here it is…

It is easier to eliminate "unattractive" behaviour then it is to become more attractive... let that sink in because it is a game changer.

Being "attractive"... most of the time... is about eliminating "unattractive" behaviour... so what exactly do I mean by this?

Here is an example...  

Back in college I was extremely shy...  and often socially awkward at social events... and very awkward around women... in fact... I would get so far into my own head that I could not speak...  I would be  second guessing everything I was going to say... so instead I sat that there like a mute the entire time.

Girls would always ask... 

"What is wrong?"

"Are you OK?"

And when I did talk... I had thought about what I was going to say so much that it came out as forced and awkward... in fact the more I tried to be funny... cool... or interesting... the more lame and awkward I appeared... I was a "social klutz!"

Then one day my Uncle Ernest gave me a piece of advice I heard a thousand times and for some reason that day it sunk in...

"Don't over think it... just talk... because that is what others are doing... just talking."

And sure enough I gradually stopped over thinking what I was going to say and just said the first thing that came to my mind... and a few months later I had my first girlfriend... more by accident then design.

Yet I learned a lesson with that experience... often its not a matter of addition... its a matter of subtraction.

As the saying goes...

"Less is more!"

This means it is not about becoming better looking... funnier... or learning powerful "lines" or techniques you can use... that can come later when you are after "attracting" the 8... 9... and 10's... the "top level."

Often it is about "figuring out" the "behaviours" that are making you appear "unattractive"... and "appear" is the "key word" here.

When I sat there like a mute I "appeared" awkward and unattractive... when I began to open up and talk more I "appeared" like an "everyday" college guy.

So here is a list of "unattractive behaviours" that will "harm" your "attractiveness" and how you will "appear" to others.
7 Behaviours That Will Make You Appear Unattractive

1...  Being "Clingy"...

Clingy or needy behaviour is doing things like calling a woman or man too much... following them around... not giving them space... always trying to make plans with them... or just generally being "around" too much.

When you act "clingy"... both men and women will view you as unattractive because they assume you have no other options... and in the worse case... your "scary" because you appear to be "stalking" them!

2...  Being "Needy"...

Needy behaviour is when you are out with a man or woman and you constantly need reassurance that they like you...

"Everything alright?" 

"Are you having fun?"  

Or if you are in a relationship and you keep telling them... 

"I love you." 

Just because you need to hear them say it back... or you keep asking...

"Do you love me?"

Both men and women get turned off by neediness because if  you are acting like you are not sure if they should like you… so they start to "second guess" themselves... and start "resenting" you for not "trusting" them.

3...  Being "Unfunny"...

Being "unfunny" is when you do not recognize that your jokes are not making anyone laugh...  it is also when you come across as "trying to hard"... and the man or woman can sense it.

This is so unattractive to others because it makes you look "socially clueless"...  and he or she can assume you are not used to hanging around cool... confident... fun people.

4... Dressing... Grooming... Badly... 

This is self explanatory... I am not a fashion expert... yet I am smart enough to know that I have to to appear stylish... and well groomed... on the men side of things... it amazes me how many men do not put any effort into wearing stylish clothes... or take care of their personal grooming... at least most women make the effort to look great... and smell good.

I cannot tell you how many men would dramatically improve their “attractiveness” by “investing” more thought... time and money into what they are wearing... and their personal grooming... yes... women notice... especially your finger nails and shoes... skin and breath odour.

And ladies... a little bit of perfume goes a long way... “splashing it all over”... like a Brute commercial is a great way to repel men and have them “avoid” you... even men avoid men who have “splashed” Brute... all over! 

I like to have my sense of smell “teased”... with a sensual “feminine” odour... not assaulted and suffer GBH... gross bodily harm to my nostrils!

Even the hardiest of men will have his “eyes water”... and his “tackle wilter”... when you have dumped half a bottle of Channel No 5 over you... and "assault" his senses... and please do not get me started on “hair spray”... we are now living in the 21st century... not 1950... your a “fire hazard!” 

5...  Being Creepy... 

I dislike the word "creepy" because women throw it around in such an ambiguous way...  yet here is a list of behaviours that generally comes across as “creepy” to both men and women...  staring at them too long before starting a conversation with them... can be very “unnerving” for the person being “starred at”... there is a HUGE difference between “gazing seductively”... and starring like a manic axe murderer.

Asking too personal questions too soon... making ill timed... “sexual references”... knowing things about  them you should not really know... it will have them feeling like you “stalk them out” on Facebook.

Creepiness is such a turn off because if feeds into the "fear" that both men and women have of being taken advantage of... or forced into doing something they do not want to do.

Not a vibe you want to give off.

6... Being Too Nice...

This is one I have written about lots... especially in the context of “The Nice Guy” and the woman who is a “people pleaser”... yes... this is one that both sexes struggle with...  it is so “counter intuitive” that it drives a lot of us crazy.

It feels so right to want to do things for him or her... help them... be the “good person”... compliment them... be a gentleman or lady... be “perfect?”

And yet it has the opposite effect... this sort of behaviour creates a "friend" vibe that ruins your “attractiveness” for creating “sexual tension”... with either him or her... there has to be a “touch” of the “bad boy”... or “naughty girl”... in the tension between you both... after all who wants to be in a relationship with a dammed  “perfect” saint... boring!

7... Being Too Scared...

This is a big one...  I suffered from this for a long time... back in my teens...  I was too scared to talk to women... too scared to ask them out, too scared invite them back to my place... too scared to kiss her... too scared to undress her… hmm... I was a sad case.

Here is the thing about being "scared" to do any of these things… it makes you seem inexperienced and unconfident...  and yet the remedy is to “reframe” being scared... to "not being scared" and has the opposite effect... it makes you appear experienced... confident... and  attractive... after all... what REALLY do you have to be scared off... the fear is mostly all in your “own mind!”

Unless of coarse you did get involved with that starring manic axe murderer in the bar... now that would be a cause for concern.

So be honest with yourself... which behaviours from that list do you need to eliminate?

For me... at various points in my life I was guilty of all of them... yes, I can freely admit that I have been the creepy guy... the important thing is to be honest with yourself about which of the behaviours you need to work on... or eliminate... here is something that will blow your mind.

Other than physical appearance which only plays a small part… being free of those seven behaviours is what makes both a man and a woman “attractive”... just by “not doing” those seven things makes you appear VERY attractive to a man or a woman.

That is when you learn “new skills” to enhance your “attractiveness” like how to talk to “communicate”... both “verbally” and “non verbally”... in ways that turns him or her onto to you... then your success begins to sky rocket.... and you “attract” the 8... 9... and 10's

The first step in improving your Personal Development... is always to be the “elimination” of “unattractive” traits... and behaviours.

The second step is always focusing on the way you “communicate”... because ultimately you are being “judged” and “assumptions” being made about you... by the words that come out of your mouth... the way you look...and the way you appear to others.

So is it not "wiser" to "invest" in “creating” a “positive appearance” of “attractiveness”... by eliminating the “negative appearance" of “non attractiveness!”

Thank you and may you enjoy a Prosperous and Dynamic day!

Yours Sincerely

Recommended Reading...

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By Ange Fonce

How aware are you of the speech patterns you use in your relationships?

Having great conversations with each other is one of the main ways that people connect.

Hurtful speech patterns you use when you talk with your lover, friends, family members, children, or boss can result in one of you feeling devalued... dismissed... or disempowered. 

When that happens... you can be pretty sure that resentment and ...

Ange is an  Author... Speaker... and Dynamic Peak Performance Personal Development Consultant... and Humanistic Counselling Psychologist and Sexologist... who works with men and women who desire to personally develop themselves and their relationships to become Dynamic Lifers... creators of their own life and wealth! 

To Speak to Ange CLICK HERE

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