Anxiety Is Not Your Enemy

Your Loser Attitude Is Your REAL Enemy 

By Ange Fonce

One of the most common questions that I am asked is simply this...

"How do I fight and get rid of my anxiety?"

Now that is in fact a huge question... it is so big that am going to target a perspective that focuses on one part of this problem and I think you will get a lot out of this if you listen close.

Here is the perspective...

"What is the fastest way to "master" anxiety and "reframe" fear?"

Let me explain it like this...

If you do not already know... I am a student of language and have invested many years studying and understanding both verbal and non verbal communication and in this article we will be focusing on verbal language... because we all THINK in language.

I grew up speaking English... so all my thoughts are in English... if you grew up speaking Spanish... your thoughts will be in Spanish... in other words what ever your native speaking language will be your native thinking language.

So when I think... I am limited to the concepts that the English language is built on... if this sounds weird to you just think about it this way... in English you put adjectives the words that describe something in FRONT of the word you are describing... so if I say... 

"I have a LONG... HARD... TASTY ... FIRM... SAUCY... sausage roll."

What did you think as you were waiting to get to the sausage roll part?

Your mind had time to make up a lot of stuff and imagine a lot of things there... did it not?

And for many of the languages of the world adjectives DO NOT come first... so people who think with the nouns first do not imagine the same things.

And this is a lot of what NLP or neurolinguistic programming is based on... so let us get back to the question about...

"What is the fastest way to overcome anxiety and reframe fear?"

What kind of images do those words create in your brain... Force... Fight... Battle... War?

Most probably what you will see is CONFLICT... struggle!

And what you end up doing is FIGHTING something instead of learning how to work WITH its energy... this is the foundational principle of a great many Martial Arts.

When force meets force you have a battle of wills AND when you think in terms of conflict and fighting... what must you assume to think that you have a fight?

You must think you have an ENEMY... in other words if I think I have got a fight on my hands... I simply MUST have an opponent an adversary to fight.

When you assume you have to fight anxiety you actually give your real enemy the loser attitude more power over you... you start to imagine your enemy in all kinds of detail... you see their armour and their weapons and their intimidating battle stance... you hear their words of doubt and fear whispering in your ear... you feel them holding you back when you want do something you want to do... look I will be the first to admit that this fear appears VERY real... you DO feel it and it does appear to exist... 99% of the time as a figment of your imagination.

Now what if the fear had nothing to do with what you actually wanted to... what if it was something else you could actually control... what if you could turn its energy around to HELP you?

This falls under the category of self sabotaging beliefs... because you are giving more power to your enemy... your loser attitude by pretending that he or she something you need to fight.

What if you reframed your anxiety as a clown... dressed in a ridiculous outfit and he or she is carrying around a bag of pretzels that they keep pushing up their nose and every time they try to talk you out of anything... they rip out a wicked fart... what do you think of your enemy now?

Not so scary now... right?

In fact... they have become downright laughable.

Here is the most important step you can take to get past your anxiety... STOP ARGUING FOR YOUR LIMITATIONS to prove your LOSER attitude!

Let me give you another perspective to work with here...

When I was first starting to learn play drums... I had all kinds of reasons why I thought I would suck playing them.

My fingers were to thick...

My hands were weak...

I was confused by all the drum beats and combinations...

I could not possibly play as good as those drummers I heard on the radio... CD...etc.

As I started to learn and apply myself... I found that playing drums was actually not that difficult and I had a very good sense of timing and rhythm... I am not going to say I am a brilliant drummer yet I am good... all my perceived limitations about myself were  totally in my own mind.

My thick fingers served me because I could play complicated scales easier than if my fingers were average sized... my hands become stronger in just 2 weeks of playing and so on.

What I see is that both men and women will defend... argue for and give all their power over to the sabotaging belief that is holding them back... they give power to their fear and so their loser attitude has control.

An Example...


You are out in a social situation and let us say you are a man and you notice a woman who you find attractive and you want to approach her to know her more and that loser attitude kicks in and starts arguing for your limitations... it could sound like this...

"But... I think that women are scared of men and they do not want us to approach them..."

"But ... what about the women that just want us to approach to get compliments?"

"But ... I think that women are just being polite when guys approach..."

"But what about...?"

"But... But... But..."

The list buts goes on and on... being endless!

And you stand there angry and frustrated with yourself the anxiety of your loser attitude beat you by feeding your self sabotaging beliefs and you have been defeated again and possible the love of your life has slipped away like a ship in the night.

If you want to you can keep giving your loser attitude more and more power by finding reasons that justifies that loser attitude even more... just KEEP coming up with those buts or you can accept that arguing for your enemy... your loser attitude is what is really holding you back and just agree to not fuel that loser attitude with any more of your fear... can you imagine how that would reframe your perception of your fear?

By agreeing not give it more fuel by having the perception of a loser attitude and instead create and develop a winner attitude to become your energy and focus.

Because you can transform that loser attitude of fear into the winner attitude by transforming the way you THINK about yourself.

Is It Hard To Transform The Way You think?

Yes I will be honest with you it can be... depends on how long you have let your loser attitude run and ruin your life... so can you transform?

Yes absolutely when you have the right tools and methods for transforming that loser attitude into a Confident Winner Mindset!

All it takes is one simple step to start making that change in your life starting right Now!

Apply to join Dynamic Life Development Systems Personal Development Academy. 

Have you any thoughts or comments you would like to share with me on what I have written?

I would love to hear from you.

Thank you and may you enjoy a Loving... Prosperous and Dynamic day!

Yours Sincerely

Dynamic Lifer... The Tribe of Dynamic Lifers

1... A person with a penchant for Science... creativity... books... writing... communication... fitness... women... sexing... sexuality... human relationships... psychology... physiology and any other area involving heavy use of the Intellect.

2... A bright person and glamorously Intelligent!

3... Ange is an Author... Speaker and Dynamic Peak Performance Personal Development Consultant... and Humanistic Counselling Psychologist... Sexologist and Multipreneur... who works with those men and women who desire to personally develop themselves and their relationships to become Dynamic Lifers... creators of their own life... relationships and wealth! 

4... If you are Happy and you Know it... you are becoming a Dynamic Lifer!

To Speak to Ange and arrange a consultation for what you would like help with CLICK HERE

"Transformation happens when people fall in love with a different version of themselves and their future!"

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