4 Persuasive Ways to Turn No Into Yes

By Ange Fonce

More often then not as you grow in your personal development... confidence... goals and business... when you will ask for something you want... you are going to hear "NO" more times than you count and for most people that no is the end of the conversation.

What you do with that answer has everything to do with you creating your success... a no can open up a wealth of opportunity.

1... A No Means That A Yes Is Possible...

Most people will not say yes to an idea without saying no first...  in fact studies show that the average person says no an average of five times before saying yes... this is because decision making is an emotional process for most people and not an intellectual one.

Most people will do more to avoid pain than achieve pleasure so the first impulse most people have when asked to make a decision is to find reasons not to make that decision... that usually takes the form of a no when what is possibly being said is "maybe?"

2... There Are 3 Generic Types Of No...

Assuming you are asking the right person that is... someone who ought to say yes and you get a "NO" usually means you have made a mistake with one of the following...

4 Persuasive Ways to Turn No Into Yes

Wrong Information... 

You did not explain well enough why yes is a good decision for the other person... therefore you must now do a better job of explaining.

Wrong Timing... 

The other person needs some time to ponder and thus is saying no to think it through... therefore you must now be patient and ask for the yes later.

Wrong Circumstance... 

There is something over which the other person has no control that is blocking him or her from saying yes... therefore you must now work with the other person to transcend the block.

3... Be Curious Rather Than Persistent...

The old adage "never take no for an answer" is usually misinterpreted to mean "keep pestering people until they say yes." 

This does not work... in fact it only hardens the no and the REAL possibility you will be resented and actually BLOCKED from that persons life.

For example...

You... "Can you invest an initial funding of £10,000?"

Person... "No."

You...  "Are you sure?  It is not a very big amount."

Person...  "Yes, I am sure." (i.e., "No.")

You...  "How about only £5,000?"

Person... "I said "NO"... please leave now."

By contrast if you become curious about the no you can continue the conversation and find out what it will take to get to yes like so..

You..."Would you be happy to provide an initial funding of £10,000?"

Person... "No."

You... "If I understand rightly though... you are looking to make investments of this kind... what is it about my plan that is not working for you?"

Now you can "LISTEN"  to their thoughts and ideas and the "problems" as they see it and work with them to overcome their objects to have them say "Yes" to you.

4... Move The Conversation Forward...

Depending upon what you learn as the result of being curious... move the conversation so that it gradually opens up the possibility of a yes. 

For instance in the example above your question might get any of three responses.

1... Wrong Information...  

In this case you roll back to that part of the discussion and clarify the misunderstanding.

Person...  "I do not understand what you are asking me to invest in?"

You...  "I apologize for not explaining it well... let us go over that part again and I will try to make things clearer."

2... Wrong Timing... 

In this case you focus the conversation on making commitments to meet again to discuss the matter.

Person...  "I need to think about this for a while."

You...  "I understand... what are the areas of uncertainty that we should clear up before we meet again?"

3... Wrong Circumstance... 

In this case you suggest a creative approach that overcomes the blockage.

Person... "We have already invested in a competitor."

You:.. "Maybe we should be thinking in terms of a merger... what can you tell me about them?"

Needless to say,.. there is a lot more that you can do to turn a no into yes and the above contains the essence of what you will need in many personal and business situations.

Never be afraid to make use of and ask "open questions" of the other person when they say "No"... that way you will get to know and understand what their problems and objections are to your initial proposal.

You then have room to negotiate... find solutions to the problems and overcome the objections and you will get a "Yes."

Not only  that... it will show you "genuinely care" and want to listen to that person... which in turn builds the most crucial ingredient... to getting that "Yes."


The foundation of ALL relationships.

Thank you and may you enjoy a Prosperous and Dynamic day!

Yours Sincerely

Ange is an  Author... Speaker... and Dynamic Peak Performance Personal Development Consultant... and Humanistic Counselling Psychologist and Sexologist... who works with men and women who desire to "personally develop" themselves and their "relationships" to become Dynamic Lifers... "creators" of their own life and wealth! 


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